Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Imagine

Now I know why they call it the travel 'bug'. It infects you, with alarming speed, and leaves you all feverish with excitement. The it sickens today with worthlessness, where all you can do is wait with bated breath for the time to jet-set away.

And most of all, it leads to hallucinations. The mind conjures up the idea that that consecutive hours of ecstasy, charm and energy fill up a place we have never seen. There is an over-riding instinct that when we reach there, locals will be delightfully helpful and noons will be refreshingly cool, that clouds won't rain on any outing and meals won't induce sleep at all, that maps will be readable and tap-water drinkable, and get this, bathrooms will be spotlessly clean! All this ridiculous dreaming despite the fact that on the last holiday, you had spent one full day constipated, a whole afternoon arguing with the taxi driver and an entire evening sulking over who was responsible for the shoddy schedules.

Of course, the inkling that you are hallucinating does nothing to reduce the madness: in fact, suspicions only increase it. You also start to hallucinate about how internet-search will help you avoid hotels with bugs and areas with beggars.

I know all this because that's the stage I am currently in, all abuzz with the conviction that 5 weeks away from home will be a piece of cake. Normally I miss Vipul even when he goes to office (yes, yes, I am the clingy variety), and now I am planning a budget that has a tight amount for long-distance calls.

Let's see how far positive thinking will take me!

Friday, May 04, 2007

Recycled

When I run out of words for my blog and there are no tags to push me out of the drought, I simply open my diary and recycle thoughts from long ago. I guess today is just perfect for an old poem, written when I began feeling a tad stagnant in my life. It's the reason why my blogs are becoming less frequent, and it is why I am off cavorting to Europe alone next month: I need to taste blood!


I miss my hormones
I miss feeling
the blood in my veins
the buzz in my head
the beat of my heart
the ringing in my ears
I miss ...just feeling

When did the days change?
When exactly did I stop enthusiastically dissecting my life over cups of coffee
or chai
or whatever cheapest vodka I'd managed to buy?

When did that world twist into work
just work, and then some couch and TV?

I must be off
To find something else
To feel something new
To just feel